“My husband doesn’t want me anymore!” You wish it wasn’t you saying this, don’t you? How in the world did you end up being a woman whose husband stopped wanting her? You thought you did everything right. You were helpful, caring and attentive. You believe you’re a great wife yet the fact that your husband never seems to even notice you anymore suggests he sees you in a much different light. Does it have to do with the fact that you’ve gained a bit of weight? Is it more about the fact that you’re now a mom when you used to just be a single, carefree woman? You’re going to be surprised to know that neither of these is likely playing a role in the distance between you and your husband. Chances are much better that your husband has just fallen into the marital rut of boredom. Pulling him out of there is the key to getting him to chase after you again.
Men love being challenged. It’s the reason they’re so drawn to sports. They love watching people battle it out. For most men, they crave being challenged in each and every area of their lives. They want to feel as though they have to put in a little extra effort to get what they want. If you were to hand most men something on a silver platter they’ll look the other way if there’s an obstacle course in front of the same item. They want to prove they are worthy and that’s true in marriage as well. Your husband no longer sees you as much of a challenge because you’re all his now. That’s why one way to spice your marriage back up is to show him that he may be a bit mistaken. Giving him a taste of a new, independent and vibrant you can transform your relationship.
Instead of focusing all of your energy and attention on what you can do to get your husband to want you again, be a little selfish. By focusing solely and completely on your own needs, you’re going to notice a major change in the dynamic of your marriage. Anytime a wife does something to change who she is, her husband falls over himself trying to figure out what’s going on. Think about it for a minute. It happens when a woman decides to change her hairstyle, or when she loses a bit of weight. There’s even a difference in her husband’s interest if she goes back to school or pursues a new job. Any small change in you is going to reap big rewards in terms of how your husband views you.
In addition to making some healthy and uplifting self improvements, start pulling back from your spouse a bit. As women we often take on the role of being the one who tries to keep the emotional part of our marriage afloat. We say “I love you” more often or we race out to buy the romantic cards on holidays. Stop doing this as often. Your husband won’t take long to notice that you’re not as attentive to his needs or emotions as you used to be. He’ll wonder why this is and as a man he’ll try to solve this puzzle himself. This is exactly what you want as it means he’ll start imagining that you’re losing interest in him or you’re considering your options outside the marriage. Once his mind starts to entertain all kinds of imaginary scenarios you’re going to notice subtle changes in him. He’ll want to show you that he’s still worth your love and attention and he’ll do that by being more like the man you first married.
Specific things you do and say can compel your husband to appreciate and love you more. Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause him to feel even more distant from you.
You can make your husband fall even deeper in love with you than when you two first married by clicking here.