My boyfriend dumped me but says he still loves me. That statement is always said with a bit of confusion. How exactly does a man who says he loves you decide to make a life altering decision like leaving the woman he claims to adore? Something isn’t adding up and you realize it. You’re not wrong to feel like you’re in the dark when this is happening to you. Unless you do something drastic now, you can kiss the man you love goodbye for good.
First things first, if your guy left but still swears he loves you, get realistic. The operative word in that statement is that he loves you. He likely never claimed to still be in love with you. There’s a dramatic difference there. He may see you as a close pal and someone to hang out with. If he was still in love with you, leaving you wouldn’t even be a consideration. It’s a bitter pill to swallow but the sooner you can accept that his feelings have indeed changed, the sooner you can get things back on track.
Many times when a man leaves a woman but tells her he still loves her it’s because he wants to have her as a back up. It sounds callous and cold but sadly it’s the way it is. You can typically tell if your guy is using you in this way if he calls you up late in the evening to see what you’re up to. You should have realized by now, by his timing, that you’re the last person on his list of people to hang out with. Don’t take it as a sign that he can’t stand being away from you. It’s clearly a sign that he’s lonely and you’re the only person left for him to hang out with.
You can’t continue to live like this. You have to make some changes and if you do you’ll find that it’s relatively easy to get him back in love with you. Firstly, you must dump him too. Doing this may feel very difficult but you have to view it as a necessity. Simply ask him to meet you and when you do tell him that although you appreciate how he’s making the effort to remain friends, you feel it would be more beneficial if you two took a real break for a time.
Expect his attitude to shift dramatically once you do this. He’ll feel as though the floor fell out beneath him. That’s because he was the one completely in control of where the relationship was headed. Now you are. If you can remain steadfast and not run back to him every time he calls, you’ll have him begging you to come back. The premise is very simple. Just take away what he thinks he has and soon he’ll want it more than ever.
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